Monday, November 30, 2009

2010 And All It Entails.

2010: The Year of Jessica.


I have decided to put the wheels in motion and move toward a change.

I talked heavily about moving to New York a month or two ago, and now my dream is becoming a reality.

Thanks to one of my near and dear friends, this dream is moving closer and closer to reality. Heather is her name and she is beyond great. You should read of her adventures and check out what she will say next at:
http://thenheathersaid.blogspot.com

Everything is crazy right now, but I love this beautiful mess. I am bouncing around topics because I tend to get more ADD when I stress. My stomach is just in knots because I want to know that I am taking this leap for the right reasons.

Five questions only I can answer:
1. Am I doing this just to get out of this town?
2. Can I really do this? (Which was coincidentally answered in the previous blog)
3. Physically, am I up for this?
4. Will I be able to handle all of this change without falling flat on my face?

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION OF ALL:
5. Am I fulfilling my dreams, making myself happy, and doing what I ALONE want to do, without any outside influences?

While I am not 100% sure of the answers to the first four questions, I know for certain that the last question rings in a riveting answer of HELL YEAH!!

In case you were curious...
Answer Key:
1. Maybe.
2. Yes.
3. Probably.
4. I won't know unless I try.

Something that I haven't even shared with some of my closest friends and family is the seriousness of my wanting to move to The Big Apple. [See ____ you were wrong, I can too keep a secret.] I hope all of my close loved ones just read this, some without even letting me know, just so that this breaks the ice. I want this to be as easy and pain free as possible. I know not everyone will support me, but I'm not doing this for everyone.

I am doing this for me.

This is real and I am me. I am exactly who and where I am supposed to be for now. My destiny is mine to decide, and mine alone. I don't need your approval or your condonence. You know who you are, if you even read this. I have my own approval and that is all that matters to me now.

I LOVE this new sensational feeling of confidence mixed with a little cockiness and sprinkled with a touch of sass. It's definitely something worth writing home about. :)

2 comments:

  1. =) thank you. i love you very, very much! and i know you're "doing this for you" ... but i like to think you're doing it a little for me, too!

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  2. Oh I am.
    I'm doing it for us.
    And for everyone like us who wants to get out there and just live for themselves.

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